Two Weeks...But Not Too Weak With Christ!

     Let's be honest here folks...as I sat down to write you tonight, a tear fell. Yep, just one, but it was a sneak attack! It's been exactly 2 weeks since I moved back to beautiful Montrouis, and my heart has never been more whole in my entire life.
    Yet, I'm not enough...never have been. Still, by the grace of my merciful God, I am filled with the One who is. Most people might argue that God never gives us more than we can handle. I humbly disagree. I think that God always gives us more than we can handle, on our own, with the promise to never leave us alone! The Truth is, I am weak. Apart from Christ, I am just a girl. Just a 22-yr-old, single, white, English-speaking girl, called to a country very much the opposite. I have no idea what I'm doing! :)
     Now, for those of you thinking, "wait...did I just burn my tax refund?!" Keep reading! It brings God no glory to tell you what I'm not, without also reminding you of who He is;

"But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you."
 (John 14:26)

*I love Haiti, but there is still so much I DON'T know here. Every day, I've watched my Teacher soften the hearts of those I encounter as I continue to learn and grow. I am a learner. A forever student of the most patient Teacher. As I stumble through each day, God sends the Spirit to go before me and with me, gently guiding my clumsy steps. I am yet refined, but I am holding to His promise to continue His work in me, all the days of my short life.

"Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable."
 (Isaiah 40:28)

*I'll admit, every night I fall into my bed, absolutely dead. It's not that my days aren't filled with indescribeable beauty, joy, and sometimes even a nap, but I'm spent! Decaying flesh and weary bones....that's all I have to offer. Yet, as I offer my bag of bones to a God who's everlasting, the God who has more than enough energy for the whole herd of us, I find strength. Even now, as I struggle to keep my eyes open long enough to finish this blog, I realize I don't have enough left in me for the things I know I have to do tomorrow. His beautiful promise? It's not tomorrow yet :) So why try to muster the strength in me today, when I'm promised God will renew me with the morning sun? My God has the answers to questions I haven't even considered yet, and that's relieving! He'll have the right words for the people who will need words tomorrow, and He'll have refreshing silence for those who will need peace. He knows where I'll go and who I'll meet.....so for tonight, I get to rest. I don't have to be anything more than my weary self. He is everything I'm not tonight.

"Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.
(1 John 4:8)

*This Truth, which adorns my bible and played a heavy role in the inspired ink on my wrist, is even more powerful to me than the previous truths. I would dare to confess that Love is the only reason I am in Haiti tonight. Love is what's filled my heart, in the absence of family and familiarity. Love, in all of His patience, kindness, selflessness, humility, trustworthiness, and honor are enough, in me. Love is my protection, my hope, and my perseverance. 
(1Corinth. 13:4-7)

I am nothing. I am weak...But in my weaknesses, I am made strong. He is enough. Is he your enoughness? That's my prayer for you today.